Yes, that is right. I did walk away from what would be one of the greatest things that would ever happen to me.
I was reading some messages I had written Charles early on in our relationship and I was reminded of how I had walked away in the very beginning.
Why? Because for a moment, just like Peter in the boat that day with Jesus, I also took my eyes off of Christ. When I did, like Peter, I began focusing on the circumstance and not Christ. Our situation just seemed too impossible.
But with so many doubts and emotions, I decided to take a second look. I could hardly stand the thought of him ever being out of my life. I wrote, “I just know that after I thought about it – our differences in schedule, and primarily major distance – I just didn’t see how it could possibly work out. But then I freaked out…and didn’t know what to do – because I thought – maybe I’m trying to figure things out that don’t need to be figured out.” By focusing on the circumstance and trying to figure things out on my own, I almost missed out on the opportunity that God had placed in front of me – the greatest relationship of my life.
So many common struggles that we face in living our life of faith is wrapped up in these very words. Every day we are faced with choices, decisions, and callings when God leads us to step out in faith and trust in Him during times that seem like impossible situations through our eyes. Maybe it is with a job – infertility – sickness – surrender of a certain struggle. We are all faced with so many things that just seem impossible. And with the circumstances staring down at us we tend to take our focus off Christ and begin to doubt. But with God, we know that all things ARE possible as it is written in Matthew 19:26, “26 But Jesus looked at them and said, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
For Charles and I, we were living two completely different lives, on two completely different schedules in two different states 12 hours apart. It seemed impossible that it would ever work out. I still don’t even really know how it did. But trusting in God every step of the way, is what made the journey not only do-able but fairly easy along the way.
One of my favorite passages in all of scripture is Hebrews 11 – “The Hall of Faith.” Charles will actually be speaking this Sunday night about one of those particular men mentioned in the Hall of Faith, Abraham. His life was also full of what seemed to be the impossible. It is the story of God promising an elderly couple with no children to their name that they would have descendants beyond what they could ever count. But because he chose to trust through the impossible, he was commended for his faith and God was able to use him in such a mighty way despite all of his flaws and mess-ups along the way.
If you are being faced with the impossible and are being tempted to try and “figure out things that just don’t need to be figured out,” I encourage you to:
- Pray and seek the Lord. This is where He can lead, guide and direct you.
- Trust. Do not trust in yourself or the circumstances around you – but trust in the Lord.
- Believe. Believe that God is a God of the impossible. Believe that He will do what He says He will do.
- Let go. Let go of the control and lay the reigns that you hold on so tightly to – and give them over to Christ.
We serve an amazing God, a God that is a God of the impossible. Trust Him and have faith that He will fulfill His promises.